Strong enough to be my man
by Welshwitch
Summary: A love story co written with Evanscene


Strong enough to be my man  
  
I've always been an independent woman, I had to after Steve died, to keep myself up in this world. At work they call me The Brass Cupcake, Hunter always says I'm tougher then any woman he knows. He's also the only one who knows my other side, the fragile and emotional person I can be. My feelings for him have grown stronger and stronger and there's nothing I want more than to have him in my life for good, but there's something playing in my mind will he be strong enough to be my man.  
  
I always know what he wants and what he thinks. He always talks to me, although there have been times when he didn't want to talk to me. But somehow I always get him to talk to me when he needs it.  
  
But he doesn't know how it makes me feel when his eyes meet mine. And he doesn't know how I felt when he said I was the strongest woman he knew. I guess I still have some kind of wall around me, cause a part of me wants him to know, the other side is afraid to let it show. Because I wonder if he is strong enough to carry the knowledge of what I feel when he is around, if he is strong enough to be my man, the man I love. But deep inside, I wonder if I am strong enough to be his woman...  
  
"Hunter, have you seen the Jones file?" McCall asked her partner as she was searching through a pile of folders. "Right under my nose," he answered. "I was working on that," "Yeah I know, but I decided to help you out," "You never help me with paper work Hunter. What's the catch," "No catch," "Hunter!!" "Ok, I wanted to finish early so I can take you out to dinner. How about that." " Sounds good, we haven't done that in a while." Dinner with Hunter, spending the whole evening in his presence. This could be the opportunity for a test. See how strong he really is. "Earth to McCall, hey what's on your mind," "Huh, oh I was thinking how about we go to that new place," "Fine with me," "Good, It's a date then." They agreed on Hunter picking her up at seven.  
  
Later that evening McCall was standing in front of her wardrobe, just having taken a shower, looking for something to wear. She could not decide between the long black dress and the shorter and strapless blue one. "I know he likes to see me in either of them, but since tonight is going to be special, I'll wear the blue." she decided and put on the blue dress. She did her hair and just a little bit of make up. "I wonder what he thinks when he sees me" she wondered.  
  
It was a little before seven when someone knocked on the door. She felt her heart beat like crazy inside cause there was only one answer to who it was. "Hi" she said when she opened up and saw how the look in his eyes changed when he saw her.  
  
"Wow, I hope you don't mind me saying that you look more beautiful than ever before" Hunter said and she could see he was blushing. And she decided to flirt with him. "I don't mind she said and smiled a sexy smile, "and I won't mind either if you say it more often, Big Guy. There are a lot of nice things I can say about you too"  
  
"Like what?" he wanted to know while they walked to his car and he looked at his partner.  
  
"I don't know just yet, but I am sure there will be a moment that I do know.." McCall answered and stepped in his car. He closed the door and stepped in as well.  
  
Not much later, they arrived at a nice, small, new restaurant close to Hollywood Boulevard. It had only been open for two weeks and McCall had heard great stories about it. She looked forward to having dinner there, especially with Hunter.  
  
And while she sat down across him and looked at him, she caught herself thinking: "I want him to be my desert..."  
  
They ordered their food and talked as they were waiting. "All the stories about this place are true," McCall said. "What stories?" Hunter wanted to know. "Nice atmosphere, pleasant people, nice food I hope," "They have a dance floor too," He said and looked at McCall with a devilish grin on his face. "No way Hunter, you're not getting me on that dance floor tonight." "We'll see about that." The food arrived, McCall ordered a seafood dish and Hunter had the days special. "This stuff is good," he said, "Here try some," and fed McCall a fork full. "Hmm," she said, "Here try some of mine." "Mmm, those shrimps are nice. Can I try some of that other fish too?" As he reached over to get some their eyes locked for just a moment. I thought my breathing stopped at that moment. I felt my heart pounding in my throat. If only he knew what I had planned for him, if only.. "This is very good too," Hunter said and snapped her back to reality. They enjoyed the rest of their meal. "Are you sure I can't tempt you into a little dance with me?" Hunter pleaded. "No you can't, but I have another idea. Why don't we go to your place for a nightcap." "I like that even better." After the bill was paid they walked to the car. He opened the door for her and she got in. As they were driving to Hunter's place he asked her; "You were a mile away tonight, what's on your mind?" "Nothing much, just something I have to remember," she replied. For a brief moment he looked at her and didn't pay attention to the road, when he turned back all he saw were a couple of big headlights coming towards the car. The last thing he heard was McCall screaming.  
  
She had no idea where she was when she woke up. The lights were hurting her eyes and every single bone in her body seemed to hurt.  
  
The room she was lying in was white. And she was all alone. She felt cold and even scared. Scared wasn't the right word. She was terrified.  
  
She didn't remember how she got here. Where was she? What was this place? How did she end up in this bed? Why wasn't she wearing her clothes and why was she feeling pain?  
  
Suddenly the door opened and a man in a white coat came walking in. When he saw that she was staring at him, he approached her. 'Dee Dee McCall, my name is Dr Jones...'  
  
'Where am I?' she asked and then the next questions came out. 'What is this place? How the hell did I get here?'  
  
The doctor sighed and looked at her. 'You don't remember what happened, Dee Dee?' He saw that she shook her head and it was time to fill her in. 'You don't remember the car accident you and your partner Rick Hunter had three nights ago?'  
  
She shook her head again. She had no idea what he was talking about. 'I'm sorry, but are you sure you're not mixing me up with someone else? Rick Hunter? Never heard of him.'  
  
Hunter was shocked to hear that she had no idea who he was. The doctor came to him after he had left McCall's room. He sat down in the chair beside him. 'I looks like Dee Dee is suffering from amnesia. She doesn't know what happened; neither does she know who you are. She doesn't even know her own name.'  
  
Hunter placed his hands before his eyes and felt tears burning. But he did not cry. He looked up again. 'Physical conditions?' he wanted to know.  
  
'Just some bumps and bruises.' doctor Jones answered', 'but all we can do now is wait to see how the amnesia will work out.'  
  
'Any chance I can take her home with me? Maybe I can show her things that might bring her memory back.' Hunter said hopefully. All he wanted was to take her home and take care of her now that she needed him the most.  
  
The car accident they had was his fault, so he believed. He had been distracted by a lot of things, mostly his partner, and they ended up on the wrong side of the road. They were hit frontally by a slow driving, thank God for that, car. He was doing pretty much alright, but for the past three days no one exactly knew how McCall was doing.  
  
'I can release her tomorrow if you really want that,' doctor Jones said, 'but its gonna be very hard to get her memory back. Its not something that can be done in just a few days.'  
  
Hunter nodded. 'I'll do everything it takes just to have her back.'  
  
The next day he could take her home. When he walked into her room, she was sitting in a chair. Dressed and looking like she always did, beautiful. But when she saw him, she raised her eyebrows. 'Are you Rick Hunter?' she wanted to know and he nodded. 'Yes, and you are Dee Dee McCall...'  
  
She shrugged and stood up. 'If you say so.'  
  
The drive to Hunter's place was a quiet one, he kept his eyes on the road and she was looking out the window wondering where she was going and why this man was taking her in. Hunter had gone to her house to pick up some things earlier that day, he also informed Charlie about the situation and he told him to take as much time as he needed to help her get her memory back. That's going to take a lot of time and patience, he thought. They arrived at his house, he helped her get out of the car, got her stuff out of the trunk and went inside. "Make yourself at home, I'm going to take this upstairs." he said to her, "Ok." When Hunter got down five minutes later he saw McCall standing in front of the mantelpiece looking at a picture of the two of them. He walked up to her and put his hands on her shoulders, he could feel she was trembling. "This picture," she said "How long have I known you. Are we married? Just friends?" she turned around to face him, " Why don't I remember, It's just a big black hole." Tears were running down her face, "I don't even know what to call you." "Come on, sit down on the couch, I'll get my photo album and tell you our story. You just call me Rick ok?" "Sure Rick." she smiled.  
  
The next few hours Hunter was telling McCall about how they met, their partnership, their friends, their job, everything but there was no sign of her remembering anything. "You know all this storytelling has made me hungry. How about I order something in." "Sounds good to me," McCall said "You know about the four basic food groups don't you; order in, take out, frozen and canned." Hunter's chin dropped to the ground, what did she just say??? Was this the first sign of her memory coming back? "Why are you looking at me like that." "What you just said, it is something you used to say, a rule you live by." "I don't know where it came from, it just popped into my head."  
  
They had dinner and McCall decided to turn in, she was tired. Hunter did the dishes, cleaned up and went to bed too. Later that night he woke up because someone was screaming, it was McCall. In a flash Hunter was standing next to her, she was sitting up, sweating and crying. "Shhh," he said as he sat next to her and wrapped his arms around her. "I had a horrible dream," she said "I was in a car, these lights were coming at me and then nothing. It was like I was floating in space." "I think you are starting to remember our accident Dee Dee. I just hope the rest will follow soon." "So will I, it feels awful not knowing who you are. Stay with me please." "I will." She lay back down and Hunter lay next to her carefully holding her.  
  
She was the first one to wake up the next morning. She looked around her, trying to get an idea of where she was. Suddenly, she did remember. How this man that was lying next to her took her out of the hospital into his house. In the middle of the night he was there for her when those awful pictures were flashing her by.  
  
She sat up and carefully she slipped out of Hunter's strong arms, left the bedroom and went downstairs.  
  
She walked around in the living room, feeling like a stranger to herself. Looking around she saw the picture of her and Rick Hunter again. Without thinking she opened up a closet and there she found something. It was a small box and she took it out, carefully opened it and found some letters. Addressed to Rick Hunter and somehow, they looked familiar to her. She took one of them and opened it. The handwriting, the words... everything that was written to this man she somehow recognized.  
  
'He called me Dee Dee.' she said to herself while she sat down on the couch with all the letters, 'this letter ends with 'Love, Dee Dee.' Did I write those to him?'  
  
Hunter woke up, sensing that McCall was missing from the bed. Like the speed of light he went downstairs and found his best friend sitting in the living room, among a bunch of papers. When he came closer he saw that she was reading letters she wrote to him over the years they had been partners. Letters she send when she was on a holiday or just.. for fun. Instead of a Christmas card she once send him a letter with memories of what they had been through together. 'What are you doing?' he asked friendly as he sat down beside her.  
  
She looked up. 'Reading. I wrote this, didn't I?' she asked for confirmation.  
  
Hunter nodded. 'Yes, you did. Do you remember writing them to me, Dee Dee?'  
  
Sadly she shook her head and her eyes turned away from him. 'We used to be pretty close, right? The picture you have of us, these letters, the way you held me last night. Tell me something, did you and I have some kind of sexual relationship?'  
  
Hunter shook his head and suddenly he realized how sad he was telling her they weren't lovers of any kind. 'No, we're partners and best friends.' He stood up and took her badge and gun out of another closet.  
  
She took them from him and looked at it. Seeing her own picture and name standing in her badge, she wiped her tears away. 'I only wish that I could remember.' she whispered and let her head rest against his shoulder.  
  
Hunter kissed her hair. 'Someday soon, it will be like it used to be. The way we were...'  
  
Later that day McCall was sitting on the deck outside enjoying the nice weather and still reading those letters. She felt someone looking at her and turned her head to the door. Hunter was standing there, "Still nothing familiar?" he asked her. "Sorry, nothing yet." There was a knock on the door, Hunter opened it and saw Charlie standing in front of him. "Hey Charlie, nice to see you come in." "I thought I'd drop by and see how McCall is doing." "She's sitting outside reading some letters she wrote to me once." Charlie raised his eyebrows looking at Hunter, but said nothing. "Dee Dee you have a visitor," Hunter said to her, she turned around and looked at Charlie. "Hello sir," she said. "Hello Dee Dee, how are you doing?" "Fine," she replied with a puzzled look on her face trying to remember who she was talking to. "May I ask who you are?" she finally asked. "I'm your boss, Captain Charlie Devane," he said. "Oh, yeah Rick told me about you. Nice to meet you." It broke Charlie's heart to see the person he knew so well not recognizing him at all. "Can I get you anything Charlie?" Hunter asked him, "No thanks, I have to get back to the office. I have some things to do." he replied "Take care Dee Dee, hope to see you back soon." "Thanks, bye." At the door Charlie said to Hunter "I knew it was bad but I didn't expect this, she doesn't remember anything doesn't she." "No she didn't but some things are coming back. She remembered our accident last night. I'm just trying to stimulate her memory as much as I can." "Good, let me know if you need anything." "I will, thanks."  
  
Hunter went back to McCall and found her sitting on the steps of the deck crying. He sat down next to her and put his arm around her, it broke his heart to see her like this. "I can't stand it that I don't remember anything," she said burying her head in his chest. "I know," was all he could say. They sat there for a while, then Hunter broke the silence; "Let's take a walk along the beach, clear our heads a little." "I'd like that," she replied, they stood up, he put his arm around her shoulder, she put hers around his waist and they walked off. When they got back Hunter made them dinner, McCall told him she had really enjoyed the walk and that he was lucky to have a place like this to live. After dinner he cleaned up and did the dishes while she settled in front of the TV. Hunter looked at her and saw that she was a mile away. "What are you thinking about?" he wanted to know. "Something just popped in my head, a white house with a drive." "Dee Dee that's where you live," he said with a little excitement in his voice. " "And a name, Jones." "That's the case we have been working on." She stood up and started pacing around the room, "I can't get any more, It's all so blurry." "Hey," Hunter said as he grabbed her, "Don't push yourself, It's coming back to you slowly. Just let it happen, ok." That night Hunter stayed with her again and she had another dream, she woke him. "Rick, we had dinner before we had the accident did we." "Yes we had," he said to her.  
  
'You wanted me to dance with you, and I didn't want to.' she suddenly said and Hunter looked at her. Was she finally regaining her memory again? This had to be another sign. She did not only remember the events before the accident and the accident itself, but she also started to remember the conversation.  
  
'And I was wearing a dress, a beautiful one.' Dee Dee said and she could see herself in that dress. She remembered herself wearing it and Hunter looking at it.  
  
You look beautiful in everything you wear, Dee Dee.' Hunter said and looked into her eyes. She didn't answer and sat down on the bed, staring into nothing, pushing herself to remember more but it all remained black. Nothing else would come back to her.  
  
Suddenly she looked up, like a bee stung her. 'Tell me more about myself.' she said and looked up to Hunter, 'You told me a lot about you and me, but tell me something about my own life. Things that happened to me.'  
  
Hunter didn't know what to say. Her life hadn't always been a pleasant one and telling her those horrible things now wouldn't make her recovery any better.  
  
But she looked at him, begging. 'Tell me....'  
  
He sat down beside her and started talking. About her first husband, Steve. The cop that was killed in action and left his wife as a young widow whom, years later finally cleared the name of her dead husband. He told her about the rape that happened to her. Times when suspects tried to hurt her. He told her everything about her he knew.  
  
Dee Dee didn't say anything when he was finished. Silent tears were running down her face and she stared at the picture of her and Hunter. 'And I survived all of that?' she wanted to know, 'how did I do that?"  
  
'You're the strongest woman I know, Dee Dee. You survived the most terrible things and you'll make it through this too!' Hunter said, but then he remained quiet when she looked up to him with a sweet smile, taking his hand in hers. 'I have you beside me. That gives me the courage, faith and power to move on.'  
  
He was shocked and she raised an eyebrow. 'What? What did I say?'  
  
'The exact words you once spoke to me when you came to me and I had to comfort you when you needed someone to hold on to,' Hunter said, 'You were so glad that I was there for you.'  
  
Dee Dee nodded. 'I know. It's that we're not lovers, or else I would say I love you.'  
  
This was too much for Hunter, he got up and walked out of the bedroom. McCall went after him and grabbed his arm turning him around, "You are in love with me are you?" she said. Hunter was staring at the floor and when he looked up she could see tears in his eyes, "Yes Dee Dee I am." She let go of his arm, "I'm sorry." "Sorry for what?" "For not knowing if I feel the same way." They sat down on the couch, just holding each other. McCall was trying so hard to remember, but she couldn't. Finally they both fell asleep.  
  
Hunter was the first one to wake up the next morning and found McCall still asleep on his chest. "You look so beautiful when you're asleep Dee Dee," he whispered while he stroked her hair. It woke her up and she looked up at him. "Good morning," she said, "Good morning," he replied, "Did you sleep ok?" "Yeah, but I could sure use a shower," "While you do I'll make breakfast," "Sounds good." So McCall hit the shower while Hunter made them breakfast. "I just love a nice warm shower in the morning," McCall thought while she was drying herself. Suddenly something popped in her head again, desert. "I was going to have him for desert. Only he didn't know and when we were on our way to his house we got the accident," she thought. As she was standing there it all came back to her, who she was, her life, her friends, her job and her true feelings for Hunter. Tears started to come down her face. Then Hunter appeared in the doorway to see what was taking her so long and saw her crying, "What's wrong Dee Dee?" "I think I got my memory back, I can remember everything." "Oh Dee Dee, that's great," he said as he took her in his arms. She freed herself from his hold and turned away, "I've got to tell you something," she started "I made myself a promise the night we went out for dinner together." Hunter looked at her puzzled. McCall took a deep breath, " I promised myself to tell you how I felt about you," she took his hands in hers, "Rick, I love you." 'Are you sure?' was all he could bring out. The shock that she had gotten her memory back was... well, a shock. And now she told him that she loved him, like he loved her. When she lost her memory, he had thought he would never hear those words coming out of her mouth and now she spoke them to him.  
  
'Of course I'm sure, you silly!' she said, 'and I'll prove it to you if you let me..'  
  
He didn't even hesitate to answer her kiss when she stood on her toes and kissed him on his lips. His lips touched hers and he carefully wrapped his arms around her like he never wanted to let go of her again.  
  
She managed to get her arms free when their kiss ended and she stepped away from him. She was only wearing her towel and water drops were falling out of her hair. Her eyes met his and he could see she was the same old Dee Dee McCall he remembered. He recognized the naughty look in her eyes and the sexy smile she sometimes gave him. Like now.  
  
'I want you to use your eyes and tell me what you see...'she said and within a second, she dropped the towel that was wrapped around her naked body.  
  
There she was. "Oh my God" was all Hunter could think when he saw her standing there in front of him, completely naked. Everything that once had been a secret to him now no longer was. It was all there to see. Her perfect body, the body of an angel. Water was dripping down her body.  
  
'Now tell me,' she said and she managed to capture his look, 'Tell me what you see...'  
  
'I see a beautiful woman.' Hunter managed to say, 'A woman I no longer want to let go. ' He stepped forward and took her naked, slim body into his strong arms and he kissed her again. She kissed him back and wrapped her arms around his neck. 'Now that I remember, I want a new memory,' she whispered into his ear with a voice he didn't know, 'The memory of you making love to me..' He looked into her eyes. 'That can be arranged. And it will be a memory you will never ever forget, memory loss or not.'  
  
She had no idea what time it was when she opened her eyes. But she knew where she was, with who she was and what she had done. She looked beside her and saw Hunter lying there sleeping. She bend over and kissed him. That woke him up and his eyes met hers.  
  
'I see you woke up,' she said and smiled while she crawled on top of him. She kissed his neck and nibbled on his earlobe. 'My memory still isn't complete.. I want more.'  
  
Hunter sighed.' More? Don't you ever get tired? I certainly do.'  
  
McCall smiled and shook her head. 'Nope, I never get tired. Get used to it cause I'll make sure you'll never forget it.'  
  
That night took away all my doubts and Hunter took away the wall that surrounded me and held me captive for so long. I was able to give him what he needed..my love. He is strong enough to be my man. 


End file.
